Summer 2005
I was standing outside Vogue Paris on Avenue Hoche with my portfolio and I was super nervous.
I’m about to enter one of the sacred temples of fashion. Per usual, I was 30 minutes early and I was just outside chain smoking up a storm.
No, I wasn’t meeting with Carine Roitfeld, I was meeting the head of the photography department at Vogue Paris.
Let’s back up a bit and tell you how I got the rendezvous.
My friend Miguel Rosales, who happens to be the greatest photographer that ever lived — you’re welcome Miguel! mentioned to me that he was entering a photo competition. At first, I was like, “he will definitely win!” As you can tell, I am a big fan of his work! Yea, he’s that good! He taught me so much about taking pictures and the fashion business in Paris! When he proposed that I should enter the competition, I was like, “Honey, I’m so out of my league here!” I seriously thought, I would embarrass myself! As you can tell, I don’t have much self confidence in myself.
Anyways, he convinced me to enter the competition.
I don’t know how I applied for the competition, if we went somewhere to apply or did it online. (back then, the internet wasn’t as reliable as it is today). But, I remember reading somewhere that one of the prizes was having a portfolio meeting with the photo director of French Vogue.
As I was walking back home from meeting with Miguel, my mind was swirling with anxiety and excitement. What images do I present? Remember, it was 2005, everything was still presented in print not digital. Do I just go on my archives and just present those images? What in my portfolio would be appropriate for this competition?
Oh, I forgot, all entries for the competition is due in less than a week! So, that’s worrisome.
Thank god that I did an editorial spec for a magazine a month before and I thought I would enter it.
Done and dusted.
Everything was laid out and all I had to do is print it.
Miguel and I went to turn in our stuff and I think the reception and the announcement of the winners was in a couple of days.
The day arrived to go to the reception. Let me tell you, I was nervous.
There were a lot of people outside, mingling and just trying to get inside.
Miguel and I walked in and we saw our work in this big table with a number to it.
Of course, I saw all these other photographers there checking other people’s work and I was like, what the hell do they think of mine? I mean, from what I gathered, I was the only American there. All of them were French.
I was Number #19.
When we got inside, maybe we were late because I think they had announced the winners.
Yea, it was kind of a let down because I would have loved to see who won.
Anyways, they had roll sheet hanging in one of the walls with all the names that had won.
Miguel and I scanned for our numbers and long and behold, my number was in it!
I was in the category of 3rd Honorable Mention.
OMMMMMGGGGGG!!!!! Mind blown!!!!
I mean, that alone just gave me so much pride and honor and satisfaction.
My work had been seen by people in the top top of fashion!
I was so proud of myself. I had a permanent smile all throughout that reception.
Miguel gave me a big hug and said, “See, you belong here!”
I asked him if he placed? He said, “No.”
I was bummed for him because I always looked up to him.
What he does is so good that I thought he would placed or even win.
Miguel picked up a couple of drinks and congratulated me for placing.
As I settled down with my excitement, Miguel pointed out the photo director of French Vogue.
I was like, “let’s go talk to her and ask her what she thought of our work?”
We moseyed on down to her and we introduced ourselves and Miguel asked her what she thought of our work?
My French was very bad so Miguel took the lead on the conversation.
My work was the closest.
She scrolled through my pictures and she said, “Ahhh, you have texture and ambiance in your work! I really like it!”
Again, mind blown!!!! All these compliments!!!
With all the confidence in the world, I ask her, if I show my portfolio to her?
She said “Oui! Why not?”
EEEKKKKK!!!!
“Come by my office tomorrow at 11am” she uttered.
She handed me her card and I clutched that business card like my life depended on it.
So, cutback to me chain smoking outside the Vogue office.
I composed myself and buzzed in to enter.
While I was walking up, I was like having an out of body experience.
If it was though, I was in a dream.
I couldn’t feel my hands whilst I was walking up the stairs.
I waited at the reception area until I was called up to come in.
All that I remember of the office were stacks of magazines and paper on desks and racks of clothes lined the hallway. I was led into the photo director’s office and of course, the lady that I met the night before.
I can tell that she was a bit flustered and her phone was ringing off the hook and interns poking at the door asking her questions.
When she did have a couple of minutes to just look at my portfolio, she grab one of my business cards and complimented my book. I asked her what I can improve or what else can I do with my book to make it stronger.
She said, “You have a good eye and trust it!”
I was a little perplexed because I really wanted her to say, can you do a beauty shoot tomorrow?”
I knew that when I walked in that my book wasn’t strong enough.
I was just lucky to have this opportunity to have a meeting with her.
I mean, the meeting lasted 5 minutes.
She offered me a cup of coffee and I was out the door.
Yeah, it was a bit underwhelming and when I was leaving, I felt like a dog that was just kicked in its stomach with its tail between its legs.
I was thinking to myself, should I have been more aggressive and asked for a job?
In the moment, I was just at awe that I was in the Vogue office; I couldn’t really process anything.
I got out on the street; started walking back to the Metro station and yes, it was a bit of a kill joy but as I looked around me and saw the Arc de Triomphe and the Champs-Elysees in the background, I was reminded that bitch, you’re in Paris! I’m lucky to be here!
